“This resistance begins at an early age. We are born into a family we haven’t chosen, and they may treat us unfairly or do things to us, so we learn to resist. We resist because that’s not how we want to live. When a person grows up in a place where their ideas and opinions are not acknowledged, it causes them to feel unwanted. If they go to their place of work and are subjected to discrimination and bias, then this becomes another place they feel they don’t belong. It all leads to resistance. This is not to say that these things are alright or that we shouldn’t push back against them. But the constant resistance encourages resentment. It ignites the ego and fuels anger. This allows our minds to be the master of our bodies. We get caught in a cycle of fight or flight. We make ourselves into the victim instead of the survivor. When we become so defensive, we forget how to surrender to the process. We cling to the pain instead of letting it go. Our anger comes from a place of expectation. We expect people to treat us a certain way. We expect things to go a certain way. When this does not happen, resistance arises. From the beginning, we think we are programming our minds to learn lessons based on our experiences, but still, we get stuck in a repeating cycle of suffering. The reason is that our life is rooted in resistance. We experience from a place of resistance. We live through the lens of resistance. We are all resisting something inside of us that has been shaped from early in life. It could be a minor incident, but it was specific enough that we became conditioned to resistance. We can pretend that we are fine, throwing ourselves into something new or letting the worry of others take the place of our own. Helping others is easier than sitting alone by ourselves and facing our inner demons. Seeing others in pain reminds us that we are not alone. It also gives us something to focus on. If we can help someone else with their pain or issues, if we do enough good, then perhaps we can avoid our own suffering. We seek happiness in anything that is not ourselves. We put so much distance between ourselves and our pain, that we can forget how to face it. We think running away from home (our inner self) is the only option, but the further we get, the more miserable we feel. These things will keep us happy for a few hours, days, or months. But eventually, we will return, and it only becomes more difficult to face it.”
Excerpt From the Book
"She is a Spirit Now"
by Farzaneh Ghadirian
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